I've been divorced for ten years now. The anniversary of the divorce decree was October 10th. It became final in 1996, twenty days before our twentieth anniversary. This coming Monday would have been our thirtieth anniversary.
I was surprised today, in the middle of the afternoon, when I realized I hadn't even noticed, and I take that as a good sign.
My biggest fear, when we first split up, was that I'd become one of those bitter, angry women who blames her ex-husband for all the problems she has for the rest of her life. It took work and fervent prayer not to stay that way--not to keep wanting him to hurt, not to keep smashing the phone down when we had to talk (it's a miracle my phone survived those first years).
My friends have watched (and helped) me change. They've listened to me vent my frustrations, watched as I grew comfortable standing on my own, and enjoyed the sight of me rolling in laughter at something they said.
In the last ten years I've been transformed. I went from a frightened woman clinging with all my might to Joshua 1:9, unsure even what I liked to do, to a woman at peace in my own skin. The journey wasn't easy--journeys rarely are--but I'm thankful to have come this far.
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go. - Joshua 1:9
4 comments:
Going through life as a Christian is such a necessary comfort and release. There is always something to look forward to. There is always a reason to [not] be afraid.
You're a peach, Skyepuppy.
Continue on your path and be strong.
I can remember the date and time I was divorced from that terrible person. However, It'll be 11 years and I can't seem to recall if I married the wonderful soulmate I have now on the 18 or 19 of November.
Funny how our minds work.
JT,
When your soulmate gets miffed that you forgot the right date (again!), remind the love of your life that trauma seers itself in your brain. But bliss has a way of muddling the mind.
Now that's a great response, Skye.
It'll be here in a few weeks. I've got to find a way to either get them to give me the date or dig out the marriage certificate.
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