Sunday, November 28, 2010

Vulcan Terrorist Attacks Portland

A Vulcan terrorist was caught Friday in an attempted attack on Portland's Christmas tree lighting ceremony. Disguising himself as a Somali native, the Vulcan took pains to cover the pointy tips of his ears, but he neglected to also disguise his eyebrows, a mistake that tipped off authorities to his true origins.

The attack didn't go through as planned due to undercover efforts by Romulans, who substituted a non-functioning detonator into the bomb-making supplies provided to the terrorist. The Obama administration has been unwilling to speculate as to a possible motive.

Friday, November 19, 2010

If I Could Make Them Pass a Law

I'd make it illegal to drive a VW bus during rush hour.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Nancy Pelosi Has Dementia

Or maybe it's schizophrenia, because the woman is seriously delusional. Her column in USA Today yesterday is proof positive.

President Obama and this Congress were job creators from Day One, saving the country from the worst economic catastrophe since the Great Depression. The Recovery Act created or saved more than 3 million jobs, and America is moving forward. October marks the 10th straight month of private sector job growth.

Congressional experts have called the 111th Congress the most productive Congress in a half-century. Our Democratic members took tough votes to support America's working families, putting the American people before politics and thinking of the next generation, not the next election.

Pelosi goes on to list the Democrats' "accomplishments." They passed Wall Street Reform so those bad apples in the Big Apple won't "cause joblessness." As though it's not Congressional recklessness causing the joblessness in the country.

And they passed a bill that lets small businesses borrow money that they'll have to pay back from the revenues that they're not getting because people aren't buying because the economy is in the toilet because of Congressional recklessness (I mean, Congressional "accomplishments").

We made the largest investment in student aid in our nation's history, reducing the cost of loans to families and reducing the deficit.

Pelosi thinks we don't know that an "investment" by Congress is really your money that they taxed so they can spend (and spend and spend) it on sending somebody else's kids to college when you can't even afford to send your own kids to the local junior college. How that reduces the deficit is beyond me.

We achieved more progress over the last four years for our veterans and military families than any time since the passage of the original GI Bill in 1944. And we did all of this while restoring fiscal discipline to the Congress by making the pay-as-you-go rules the law of the land.

Usually when the word, "progress," comes out of the mouth of a politician, it's a bad thing. But I'm not really sure what kind of progress they inflicted on our military and veterans. But let's assume that this time it's a good thing. Notice that she goes back four years, not just the last two. Could it be that President Obama hasn't been progressive for our military? Could it be that President Bush was beneficial? Could it be that the Democrats want to take credit for anything good that happened during the last two years of the Bush Administration but want to place all the blame for the bad things on Bush? Pelosi's got a lot of nerve on that one.

But the one that really frosts my chaps is the part about "restoring fiscal discipline" by passing pay-as-you-go rules. Riiiiight! They waived the Pay-Go rules for the Stimulus bill and used some neat tricks and carved out plenty of exceptions, so that the federal debt limit is over $12 trillion and the deficit for fiscal year 2009 was $1.42 trillion. If that's "fiscal discipline," I'd hate to see what happens when Congress runs amok with our money.

So now, after two years of shutting Republicans out of the decision-making process, the Democrats suddenly want to "work together" with Republicans. In fact, they "welcome Republican ideas about job creation." How truly selfless of them. Because Pelosi assures us that she and her fellow Democrats are fighting for us - the people - for our jobs, for the economy, and for the middle class.

And she thinks we're going to believe that. Like I said, Nancy Pelosi is demented.

Wednesday, November 03, 2010

Election Results (Updated)

I was hoping that California would finally wake up and smell the manure and get rid of it. But apparently not. State offices are going to a straight Democratic ticket with just under 50% of the precincts reporting.

If the results continue this way, we're so screwed.

Update (Wednesday):

They did, and we are.