Saturday, July 14, 2007
Iran Arrests Spy Squirrels
Ynet News (Israel) reported yesterday that Iranian intelligence officials have arrested 14 squirrels (not pictured here) for being spies of the West.
"In recent weeks, intelligence operatives have arrested 14 squirrels within Iran's borders," state-sponsored news agency IRNA reported. "The squirrels were carrying spy gear of foreign agencies, and were stopped before they could act, thanks to the alertness of our intelligence services."
Iranian police commander Esmaeil Ahmadi-Moqadam confirmed the report, saying that a number of squirrels had been caught bearing foreign spy gear within Iran's borders.
Recently, Iran has increased its efforts in combating espionage by the West. The use of rodents has not been documented in the past.
I figured the government uses whatever methods it thinks will work. The Navy uses dolphins. Lots of agencies use sniffer-dogs. But the CIA has been very effective at keeping its Secret Spy Squirrel program (SSS), well, a secret. I never knew.
Leave it to the crack Iranian intelligence operatives to sniff out the secret.
How we got the squrrels trained to cross the Iranian border, wearing all of their elaborate spy-gear, is amazing. But then, if a squirrel can learn to water ski, I guess squirrels can learn to to work for God and Country and even put their lives on the line.
Just don't let PETA find out what we've been doing with these brave rodents.