Thursday, June 29, 2006

Motoring With Mom

Janice at You Heard It Here... is planning a vacation to Hatteras Island in North Carolina (here, here, here). It sounds wonderful (except for needing some kind of foot protection for her dog on the beach's hot sand). I'd love to see it and the rest of the Outer Banks.

Earlier this month I had a couple posts about possibly touring the country with my mom, and I asked for recommendations of what to see in your state. I got some great recommendations, but there was this comment from Skye (no relation) that got me to reevaluate my mom's idea:

My vote is for you to go on the trip with your mom. How often does a person get an opportunity like that?

She's right. How many times do we wish for "if only"? How many people don't have that option anymore because their parents are too old or too feeble or no longer with us? How many times do we let our dreams wither and grow weeds from neglect or the feeling that we just can't do something so foolish? Dreams have a way of turning into regrets while we're not looking.

When I was young and married (before kids), my husband and I fulfilled a dream I'd had since Junior High: to see the châteaux of the Loire in France. We spent four months on bicycles in six countries in Western Europe. And I doubt if we would have gone, if it weren't for the goal-setting class my job made everyone take. It hadn't occurred to me to do something about that dream before then.

But that trip is one of the biggest highlights of my life.

So now I've gone from about 20% - 30% decided to 99% decided (that 1% is in case God intervenes and says it's not the right thing or the right time) in favor of the trip with my mom. So that means we've got decisions to make. The first decision has already been made: When do we leave?

My daughter plans to go to her Christian ministry program in Texas this coming January, so that would be good timing for me, but I got to thinking about my sister. She just got my mom's company, after so many years living on opposite edges of the country. Our family has been about as spread out as you can get in the continental US. I'm in California, my sister is in Texas, my brother is in Massachusetts, and my parents were in Montana. For me to swoop into town and head off with my mom for a year, after so short a time of her being with my sister seems wrong.

This school year my sister's youngest will be a senior in High School, and I know my mom will enjoy the time hanging out with one of her grandkids. So we've decided to wait until after the granddaughter graduates next June.

A year. We have a year to get ourselves ready, for my mom to find the right RV (used), for me to talk with my ex-husband's dad and stepmom about the practical side of living in an RV (they did that for a couple years after he retired), and all the rest of the readying that I'm not yet aware that I need to do.

And a big part of that is: What do you recommend that my mom and I should see in your state?

I still need to know about New Jersey, because what I know is what my sister-in-law told me years ago when we went there to visit. She said that Mahwah is New Jersey's equivalent to Deliverance-style inbreeding. I was never sure if she was serious, or if she had a deadpan delivery of some New Jersey inside joke. But I don't think it would be wise to go to Mahwah and start staring at people to see if I can spot signs of inbreeding in their faces. I really would like someplace better to visit.

The other big question is: Should we get a motorhome and tow a little car, or should we get a pickup truck with a fifth-wheel? Which setup will be easier for us to maneuver? Rumor has it the gas mileage is about the same. If you've got experience with both, that would be especially helpful, but one or the other is good too.

Please leave the state attractions at the link above (it keeps them all in one place), and leave the RV recommendations on this post.

My mind is still reeling from this decision. It's far enough away that it feels academic, but I have a lot of work ahead of me between now and then. Not the least of which is to try to get some sleep before I have to get up for work tomorrow.

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