Monday, February 12, 2007

Valentine's Day Killjoys

Sometimes I think I should just stop reading the news, it gets so ridiculous. But I make the sacrifice, so you can be as disgusted as I am.

The Telegraph (UK) reported Saturday about the dangers of Valentine's bouquets.

The Valentine's Day bouquet — the gift that every woman in Britain will be waiting for next week — has become the latest bĂȘte noire among environmental campaigners.

Latest Government figures show that the flowers that make up the average bunch have flown 33,800 miles to reach Britain.

Environmentalists warned that "flower miles" could have serious implications on climate change in terms of carbon dioxide emissions from aeroplanes.

"Serious implications." Not minor ones.

Vicky Hird, of Friends of the Earth, said: "We don't want to be killjoys because receiving flowers can be lovely but why not grow your own gift?"

Yes, they do want to be killjoys. Environmentalists don't want you to travel for "frivolous" reasons. They don't want you to drive in comfortable cars. And now they don't want you to surprise your wife with a bouquet of flowers.

Ms. Hird doesn't seem to realize that if a husband starts growing roses (red ones) in the back yard, his wife might figure out what he's doing, and the surprise would be ruined. Besides, how many British men know how to time their rose-growing so the flowers are just right for Valentine's Day? It takes a professional for that.

And if husbands and boyfriends cave in to the pressure by environmentalists and give chocolates instead, how long would it take before the environmentalist decry the greenhouse gases produced by shipping chocolate? It becomes never-ending.

Appeasement is never the answer. Fight back! Stop the killjoys. Send your sweetheart some flowers for Valentine's Day.

6 comments:

Christina said...

Good advice, Skyepuppy! The problem is, all this snow we're getting (from global warming, no doubt) is getting in the way of deliveries...

religion of pieces said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Malott said...

I think this warning makes as much sense as anything else the Liberals are saying.

Besides, "Adult Lovers" should write a yearly letter to each other on V.D. expressing their appreciation and feelings - They should take an hour and do it well. They should then pocket the money they save and eat out some time in March when the restaurants aren't crowded.

(Obviously a male is writing this...)

SkyePuppy said...

ROP,

Please try to remember your manners. Your comment had absolutely nothing to do with the subject of my post.

You can get your own blog, you know. It doesn't cost anything...

SkyePuppy said...

Chris,

You missed the point about how the flowers just die anyway, so they're really a waste of money.

Malott said...

Valentine's Day... Waste of money...Yes, I believe got that...

Another Holiday about relationships which centers around commerce and satisfying some mercenary personality flaw... pathetically trying to compensate for some unsatisfied relational longing... yes, I believe I got that...

Sorry about wandering from the subject of a very entertaining post. But I'm snowbound, you see, and cannot think clearly.

Me and R.O.P. Tsk Tsk