I finally went to see "Eight Below" this afternoon, during what will probably be its last week in the theaters. On the way there, I passed two newish motor homes parked along the road with For Sale signs in the windows.
I wasn't really tempted to buy one, but I wished I could retire and buy one and drive around America--even if it meant I'd have to pay a small fortune for gas.
And then when I watched the movie, there was something about the characters that touched me. These people knew what they were made for--a pilot, a cartographer, a guide with his sled dogs, a researcher looking for celestial treasure--and they lived it.
Friday I left work early to meet a friend at Starbuck's and talk about life. She's the kind of person who loves helping other people find their purpose in life and then go after it. I told her about my job, which had better hours this past week (which is bad, because it means we might not make plan, which means no bonuses), and then I told her about my travel writing and my ideas for a tour company that caters not just to Christians but to Christian-meaningful destinations. And she stopped me at one point and said, "Look at you! You're all lit up." But I didn't light up when I talked about doing computer work.
It's hard to know the steps to take to get from here to there--and even harder to have the patience for it.
As I watched Eight Below, I was awed by the scenery of Antarctica (more artistically done in March of the Penguins). And I was drawn to the character Jerry's travel trailer that he lived in because he was gone from home so much of the year. There's a certain appeal to living that simply, especially because of the reason.
The movie was good. I enjoyed it (no, Daughter-of-mine, I didn't cry), but my enjoyment was on two levels. First, it told a good story that wasn't Disney-schmaltzy. And second, it was one more avenue of reinforcing my dreams.
2 comments:
Your post reminds me of Adam Sandler's "Mr Deeds" when he asks his stockholders what they dreamed about becoming when they were young. Most of them mentioned noble professions and callings, none of which centered around making a lot of money. I think it's true that many of the more fulfilling jobs we seek for our life's work come with a poor man's wages. It's a scary trade-off.
My work is in no way a sacrament to me, and I sometimes wish I could break free and do something else... usually when I am depressed and thinking that I've wasted my life.
When I am lonely or thinking about the "life" I might have had, I think about Joni Ericson Tada in her wheelchair, about hungry orphans in Zimbabwe, stuff like that... and I remember that earthly dreams are often a spoiled man's fancy and an American aberration. And, that my job... my lack of a wife and children... none of it really matters.
Like you, I have chosen a road that will soon bring me to everything my little conciousness could ever dream of or desire, and more. But until then SP, I will continue to pray every morning that you will find something in this brief moment, this hiccup before heaven, that makes your days more pleasant and fulfilling. That way you'll be able to experience all your joy and peace more effortlessly.
Chris,
You're right, of course, about our "spoiled man's fancy," and yet God has not reserved all of His blessings for heaven only. He has abundantly blessed "this hiccup before heaven" with joy and love and grace and a peace that passes all understanding, so those who choose Him can have just a taste of what's waiting for us when the hiccup has ended.
And He gave us tears, because He knew we would need them, and so He can wipe them from our eyes for good one day.
A life lived well is never wasted, no matter what happens to our earthly dreams. The work I do is not my dream, but still I take satisfaction in knowing I do it as well as I can. And I believe (hope? wishfully think?) that by having a ready smile or a brief conversation with a little laughter with the people I see there, that I've made my workplace a little bit better for my having been there.
Still I don't have any doubt that God planted in us the ability--the need--to dream, and what was that for if we're not supposed to use that ability? He may not intend for us to fulfill all our dreams (some dreams would be harmful), but I think He uses them at least to keep us from complacency.
I'm grateful for your prayers, and for your encouragement.
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